Title: Amor est Vitae Essentia
Characters: One, Vicki, Ian/Barbara
Rating: PG
Word Count: 3,558
Beta: van. As always, you're wonderful! ♥
Spoilers: The Romans, I guess. This takes place during that month before anything actually happens in that serial. Other than the fact that they're in ancient Rome, there aren't any. And that fact can be gleaned from the title.
A/N Written for the_chestertons ficathon for tigerkat24 who asked for UST. I hope this will suffice. The title is Latin for "Love is the essence of life."

I know these aren't due until Sunday, but I'm going to be incommunicado for the next three days. Better early than late. :)


For the first forty-eight hours, Barbara felt uneasy. She'd been traveling with the Doctor long enough to know that to get relaxed was to let her guard down. It was when she let her guard down that bad things began to happen. Not always right away, but within a day or two, things usually started to go wrong. So, although there was no indication that anything would go wrong this time, she knew better.

Barbara was amazed that the Doctor and Vicki immediately relaxed into the Roman atmosphere. Instant relaxation. She could understand Vicki's relaxing; the girl had never been anywhere with the Doctor before. Barbara could also understand the Doctor's relaxed attitude. He was always relaxed whenever they landed somewhere new. Always the adventurer, open to anything.

However, Barbara had noticed that Ian also felt the same apprehension she did. Several times she caught him peeking carefully around corners and looking sideways at passersby in the street. After two days in the villa, Barbara decided that they might just be safe this time. Yet, she was still cautious.

On the third day, the Doctor suggested that she go to the market with Vicki instead of himself. Barbara knew the Doctor long enough to instantly suspect something.

“I have no ulterior motive, my dear, other than to get you out in the fresh air. You've been cooped up in this house long enough!” he said, pointing a bony finger at her.

Barbara relented, and after locating Vicki (who had taken to wandering through the olive grove), they went to the market.

“So, what are we getting, Barbara?”

“I don't know. What do we need?” she asked. Barbara knew perfectly well what they needed and what she had money for, but the teacher in her always liked to challenge young bright minds. Even though she strongly suspected that Vicki was much more intelligent than her, she was still just a child.

“Oh, don't give me that! You spend all day sulking around the villa, and you don't do anything, you must know what we're getting today. What else is there to do all day while you're cooped up in that....” Vicki trailed off.

Barbara didn't say anything, more concerned that they not get lost, or worse, robbed.

“Oh. I see.” Vicki had a hint of mischief in her voice, and a crooked smile on her face.

“What do you see, Vicki?” asked Barbara, suddenly aware that she had not been listening to the girl.

“Well, the Doctor and I are gone all day. You stay in the villa, not going anywhere. Ian stays in the villa, not going anywhere.” Vicki looked up at the sky, innocently. “Such a beautiful day, isn't it?” she asked.

Barbara was stunned into momentary silence. Vicki was young, but she obviously wasn't naïve. Somehow that revelation surprised Barbara. But why should it? She had just been reflecting that Vicki may have been young, but she was very intelligent. Vicki was a very observant young lady. Barbara stopped and looked at Vicki who was still staring innocently into the cloudless sky, her hand shielding her eyes.

Not since Ian and Barbara had been kidnapped by the Doctor had she thought about her feelings for him. When they were still colleagues at Coal Hill she had considered it, but after what happened, she buried her feelings deep inside. They were too busy trying to save their own lives to even consider starting a romantic relationship.

“Ian is my friend. We've been through a lot together,” she finally admitted.

Vicki lowered her eyes from the sky and looked at Barbara. “Oh. I just thought ... you two seem very close.”

“Well, we are,” Barbara said. “Like I said, we've been through a lot together. You develop a bond with people that you have shared dangers with.”

“What about the Doctor?”

“What about him?”

“Well, it's plainly obvious that you don't think of the Doctor the same way you think of Ian.”

“Of course not. For one thing, I've known Ian a lot longer. And for another, it wasn't our choosing to go traveling with the Doctor. You had a choice. We didn't.” Barbara paused, reflecting back on that night in Totters Yard. After a moment, she spoke again. “There were a lot of hurt feelings that we had to deal with. Between us and the Doctor.”

“But you and Ian were still friends.”

“Well, yes. How could we not be? Thrown together in a situation like that?”

“And nothing ever happened?”

“Happened? Oh. Happened.” Barbara smiled, perhaps a bit too sadly. “No, nothing.”

Vicki pointed ahead. “See, there's the market up ahead, just around the next turn. Oh, I do want you to see this lovely cloth I saw the other day. The Doctor said I was being frivolous for wanting something so beautiful, but I don't care.” She grabbed Barbara's hand and pulled her toward the bustle of Roman Humanity.

Barbara spent a very pleasant few hours browsing the stalls and looking at the things she could buy. She had been with the Doctor for some little time, now, and although she had been to several places in history, it still never ceased to amaze her. She was actually in the past, doing and seeing things that historians only dreamed about. If she let it overpower her, she could almost feel the giddy laughter bubble up from her throat. But she controlled it.

Purchases made, Barbara and Vicki turned homeward. At least, villa-ward. Barbara had begun to think of it as home, and although she didn't know how long they'd stay, the Doctor seemed content to stay as long as they were able. And if that meant weeks, or months, then so be it. Barbara decided that there were certainly worse places to have a vacation. She was finally beginning to relax.

“I've seen Ian looking at you,” Vicki said suddenly.

The sudden interruption of Barbara's reverie caused her to jerk her head in Vicki's direction. “What do you mean?” she asked.

“Well, he looks at you.”

“And?” Barbara prompted. It wasn't as if Barbara really wanted to know what Vicki was apparently trying to say, but she couldn't help herself.

“I think he likes to look at you.”

“Vicki,” Barbara said, stopping to sit on a boulder along the dirt road. “Ian and I have known each other for quite a while, it's true. We suddenly found ourselves thrust into an uncertain and dangerous situation. We were the only thing we had that was familiar. Yes, we are close. But we're friends. We've seen too much danger to risk a relationship.”

“That's silly,” Vicki said, interrupting Barbara.

Barbara took a deep, patient breath. “Why is it silly?”

“Well, if Ian is the only thing familiar to you in your travels, then isn't that a good enough reason to have that relationship?”

“But we do. We're friends, don't you see?”

“Yes, but if he's all you've got....”

“Vicki, I understand what you're saying, or rather, not saying. But we're happy. We don't want to risk damaging a good friendship with something that may not last, or work.”

“You mean, you don't want to risk it.” Vicki turned and walked up the dusty road.

Barbara watched her, amazed at just how grown up Vicki really was.

Later that evening, after the group of friends had eaten their meal, the Doctor and Vicki retreated outside. They usually did after the sun went down. The Doctor wanted to look at the stars and Vicki wanted to learn whatever he was willing to teach her about the universe.

Barbara reclined on a couch in the courtyard. Her eyes were closed and she relaxed into the sounds of the evening. She could hear the cries of distant birds, the chirp of nearby crickets and the occasional peal of laughter from Vicki in the olive grove behind the villa. Water splashed in the fountain behind her and she allowed the sounds to soothe her into slumber.

She had just permitted her mind to sleep when she felt the stirring of air on her face. She opened her eyes to see that Ian had just passed by her, and was now sitting on the edge of the fountain behind her. He stared into the water. Barbara looked into his face for a moment. He was handsome, definitely, but she already knew that. His dark hair fell across his forehead and his eyes sparkled with the light from the oil lamps nearby. Why had she resisted getting involved with him? For a long minute, she honestly could not remember.
“Penny for them?” said Ian.

“What?” asked Barbara, suddenly realizing that she was staring.

“Your thoughts.” Ian turned to face her, a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth.

Barbara took a deep breath. Obviously she didn't want to share what she was truly thinking. A new subject materialized in her mind. “I keep waiting for something to happen,” she finally said.

“Daleks coming through the door, you mean?”

“Yes,” Barbara said with almost a chuckle. “Or Roman Centurions.”

Ian nodded. “It took me a while to relax, yes. But nothing has happened so far, and we've been here for three days already.”

“That's what worries me.”

“What?”

Barbara sat up. “The longer we have to wait, the worse whatever happens will be.”

Ian smiled. “I don't think anything's going to happen while we're here.”

“How can you be so certain?”

Ian paused, his eyes deep in thought. “It just doesn't feel like it will.”

“I wish I had your sense of calm.”

“I didn't always, you know.”

“Yes, I noticed you were just as tense as I was the first few days we were here.”

“Oh, you were watching me, were you?” Ian teased.

Barbara felt a blush creep up her face. “Just concern.”

Ian's smile widened, then he suddenly turned back to watch the fountain. “Yes, we were both more than a bit anxious, waiting with bated breath.”

“For something to happen,” finished Barbara. Her voice was soft.

Ian turned to face her. Their eyes met. “Yes,” said Ian, his voice gentle.

Barbara wanted to pull her eyes away, but there was something so compelling, so tender, in Ian's face, she found it difficult.

Ian broke the look first. He stood up and gestured to the cups that were still on the table. “More wine?”

Barbara turned and dropped her legs over the edge of the couch. “Why not?” She watched as Ian walked over to the table. She couldn't help but notice how the toga swished around his knees, and how strong his legs looked in those Roman sandals. She felt acutely embarrassed and averted her gaze.

A goblet of wine appeared in her field of vision, and Barbara looked up into Ian's smiling face. She took it, offering a smile of her own. “So we should just relax and enjoy our holiday?”

Ian held out his wine to her. “To unplanned holidays!”

Barbara tapped his goblet with hers, and they both drank.

The days passed and Barbara began to thoroughly relax. She felt the knots in her shoulders loosen, and her neck and back seemed to be in less pain. She hadn't noticed how much strain her lifestyle had put on her body. Now that she was beginning to relax, she was finding just how many sore spots she had. One afternoon while she bathed, she discovered a fading bruise on her side, just above her right hip. She had no idea how it got there, but that didn't surprise her. Life with the Doctor was always full of bumps and bruises.

Barbara and Ian had fallen into a pattern in the evenings. After they ate, the Doctor and Vicki would retreat into the olive grove. The teachers would relax by the fountain and talk about their time at Coal Hill. They would share some wine and talk about their lives before the Doctor. Occasionally they would talk about Susan or about things that they had experienced while with the Doctor. But usually they preferred to forget about it, just wanting to remember their lives before.

Guards were let down, and Barbara found that she was sharing more and more with Ian. Things that she would not have told him had they not left Earth. Being through so much danger had brought them closer. She was beginning to realize that Vicki might have been right. It was easier to relate to Ian. He was the only human in her life. Well, there was Vicki now, but she was just a child. Ian knew her before. Before Susan. Before the Doctor. Ian was similar in age and background. It was so easy to talk to him.

Barbara was sharing a story about her aunt and the wonderful cakes she used to bake for tea when she was a child. Barbara remembered sitting at the big table with her aunt, sipping the tea from an adult cup and holding the cup and saucer like a proper little girl. She smiled at the memory as she unconsciously worked at a knot in her shoulder.

“Are you all right?”

“What?”

“You've been rubbing your shoulder for the last five minutes.”

“I'm just a little sore. Now that we've had time to relax a bit, I guess my shoulders are starting to relax as well. All that tension is fading away. It's nice, actually.”

Without saying a word, Ian stood up and crossed behind Barbara. Brushing aside a few stray curls, he placed his hands on her shoulders. Her shoulders were nearly bare, and Barbara could feel his warm hands on her naked skin. She refused to think about it, regardless of how good it felt. Ian kneaded at her shoulders and began to tell her about his own aunt.

“She made terrible cakes. I remember choking them down with tepid tea while being forced to sit with the adults and listen to their boring conversation.”

“You just wanted to go play, didn't you?” asked Barbara, desperate to focus on anything except for what Ian was doing to her.

“I had a slingshot in my pocket and more pebbles outside than I knew what to do with.”

“What did you shoot?”

“Whatever I could find. Usually tin cans set up on rocks or old stumps.”

“Good. I'd hate to think you were shooting birds.”

“Concerned for my upbringing?” Ian stopped moving his hands and leaned around Barbara to meet her eyes.

Barbara smiled at him. His face was so close to her own. Just inches away. “You're not a killer,” she said. Barbara managed to stop herself before saying, “you're a lover.” The words must have been on her face, because Ian raised an eyebrow at her. His eyes were twinkling and he looked as mischievous as that little boy he was telling her about.

“No. I'm not,” Ian said. He continued to stare into Barbara's eyes, a crooked smile on his lips.

Barbara wasn't sure, but it seemed to her that Ian was suddenly closer, his face moving towards hers. Instinctively she leaned in to him. Her eyelids fluttered. She was unable to take her eyes from Ian's.

A peal of laughter from the olive grove caused Ian to jump back. Vicki and the Doctor stepped into the courtyard laughing.

“Oh, Barbara!” Vicki came over to where Barbara sat. “You should have seen the look on the Doctor's face when that quail came out from behind that tree!” Vicki began laughing again and Barbara joined in.

“I didn't think it was that amusing, my child,” scolded the Doctor.

“Oh, come on, Doctor,” said Ian, stepping over to his side. “You've got to relax and have a little fun!”

Barbara looked at Ian and she could have sworn that Ian winked at her.

The following morning, Barbara rose late and after dressing and pinning up her hair, she went down to the courtyard for breakfast. Ian was sitting at the table they shared during their evening meals. He had a cup of wine in front of him and was poking around in the bowl of fruit.

“Good morning,” Barbara said cheerily. Perhaps a bit too cheerily. After what had almost happened the night before, she wasn't exactly sure how she should act. Normal and casual. So cheery was probably all right.

Ian looked up. “Morning!” he replied, a smile on his face, a pomegranate in his hand.

Barbara passed by the table and went into the kitchen area, if one from her century could call it a kitchen. She stoked up the fire and found the jar of creamed goat cheese from the night before. Barbara stirred it up so it was fresh; it had separated a bit overnight. When the fire was hot, she dropped some flatbread over it, to toast it. Once it was thoroughly heated through, Barbara scooped it onto a wooden plate, picked up the jar of cheese and went back to the table.

Barbara could feel Ian's eyes on her as she moved. She sat and gestured to the bread, her eyebrows raised at Ian. He nodded to the unasked question. Barbara ripped the bread and handed him half. She watched as Ian tore off a corner, scooped up some of the cheese and popped it into his mouth chewing thoughtfully.

“Remarkable,” he said.

“That something so simple should taste so good?” Barbara asked, dipping into the cheese herself.

“No.” Ian swallowed. “I meant you.”

Barbara stopped, her hand halfway to her mouth. She stared at Ian. “Me?” she said when she found her voice.

“Yes.” Ian tore off another piece of bread and reached for the jar of cheese. “Where ever we end up, you always seem to be able to provide something tasty to eat.” He looked into her face. “Remarkable.”

Barbara's face flushed. “My mother and aunts were very concerned that I should be well taught. Any praise belongs to them.”

“Well, when we return to our time, I'll be sure to thank them!” Ian put another piece of bread into his mouth and chewed, a smile on his face.

Barbara hid her own smile with a bite into the date she had fished from the fruit bowl. The friends ate in silence, neither one talking about the night before. Barbara was hesitant to bring it up for fear that it was all in her imagination. What if it was? What if it wasn't?

“Where are the Doctor and Vicki?” Barbara asked. “Are they outside again?”

“They've gone down to the market. They're selling some produce today as well as a few quail that the Doctor managed to catch.”

“Oh, I hope he left one for us. I'm getting tired of fish.”

Ian nodded as he swallowed a mouthful of wine. “He said he left one out back.”

“Good.” Barbara thought about her day which suddenly would be spent cleaning the bird and cooking it. “At least I'll have something to do today.”

“It does get a bit boring, doesn't it?”

Barbara nodded. “Yes. I enjoy relaxing, but sometimes I wish I had a book to read.”

“Mmm. Well, you're the history teacher. What did Romans do to pass the time?” Ian sat back in his chair, arms crossed.

Barbara stood up from the table and moved to the couch, and sat. “Well, in Rome the people gather in the Colosseum to watch the gladiators or to watch Christians try to defend themselves against vicious animals.”

“Not really my cup of tea,” Ian said, licking pomegranate juice from his fingers.

“No, nor mine.”

“What about people who don't live in Rome? We're not exactly down town out here.”

“A lot of eating goes on. The wealthy are always throwing parties of one sort or another, hosting orgies,” Barbara stopped. She desperately wished she could take back what she had just said. Deliberately not looking at Ian, she continued. “Frequently men of learning were brought in for debate and discussion amongst the men.”

“In other words, they got bored, too,” Ian said.

Barbara glanced up. She could see the same mischievous grin on Ian's face from the night before. “Yes. They did.” Barbara didn't know what else to say. Her eyes focused on the stone floor, not wanting to look at Ian's face. She knew that she could just hide away in the kitchen all day, preparing their dinner. It would be best. The Doctor and Vicki would not return until after dark and that left Barbara alone in the villa with Ian. All day.

The air suddenly felt very heavy. Suffocating. Barbara wanted to get out. But she also wanted to stay. Barbara was utterly torn. She couldn't look at Ian, but she found that she desperately wanted to. Everything seemed to be happening, and yet nothing at the same time. She sighed.

“Problem?” asked Ian, who had suddenly materialized next to her on the couch.

“No,” Barbara said, her voice soft. She hadn't noticed when he crossed the room, and she could barely remember the moment he leaned toward her.

His lips tasted like the pomegranate he had just eaten, his kiss gentle and tender.

A second later, and they were gone, a smile in his eyes. “I think we need to talk.”

Barbara stared at Ian for a moment before nodding, smiling in return.